No matter which side you're on, this deserves to go viral.Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Monday, December 28, 2009
New Year's Reading 2010
Wheel of Fortune Spread
Embellished Wheel of Fortune Spread
New Year's Reading $200
Covers eastern and western astrology, numerology and special wheel of fortune spread describnbg the energy of the new year and how best to use it. Email nancy@bemyguide.net for more information and to schedule your reading.
Saturday, December 26, 2009
Friday, December 18, 2009
Tiger Woods and Pluto into Capricorn ... and YOU!
Tag Hueuer has now distanced itself from Tiger WOods. We see business acting as a moral force. It's the GREAT thing about business and with Pluto going in to Capricorn it's time to come of age - just like war spawns all sorts of very valuable medical and technical advances, business brings a certain type of backwoods equity, i.e., if you can afford to pay x amount I will sell it to you regardless of r c or c.
Pluto is firmly in Capricorn now. If you ever doubted the undermining power of this planet look at what happened to Tiger Woods’ life in just a few days. Tiger Woods has his Sun in Capricorn.
The same thing is going on with our own individual social and familial structures. We may not all by any means be living double lives but somehow it is possible to drift into bad territory and get stuck there, like with a long marriage or family dynamic that has become quite toxic. If so, this will probably be the worst holiday season you’ve ever had and the toxicity of your relationships may become just too deadly to ignore any longer. That’s Pluto at work.
Very many of you are absolutely at your wit’s end, knowing you simply cannot bear the status quo a minute longer .
This is Pluto at work. My advice is to take a good look at all of it and say goodbye, knowing you’ve tried your hardest (probably since 1982). Then prepare to act on your discovery in 2010. Prepare to see it all fall apart or fall away to reveal a better place for you, a better relationship or relationships. This is Pluto ending the 1982-2009 cycle and starting a brand new one.
It certainly will help to get a Tarot or astrology reading and I’m here working all during December and January.
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Nancy Fenn's Sympathetic Other Woman Survey
age =: 30
name for married lover: Darryl
make up a name for you: Stephanie
how did your relationship get started =: In 1998, Darryl and I met as we were neighbors. I moved shortly afterwards and we lost touch. Four years later, he and I reconnected. I heard that he had gotten married, but I was never interested in dating him. When we met to have dinner (as friends), he informed me that he was seperated and living at home with his parents. We then started to spend all of our time together. Since he is a truck driver, he was often gone for about two weeks at a time. We became so close that he was pratically living at my house. About 4 months into our relationship, I started receiving phone calls from what I thought was his ex-wife. His wife and I ended up meeting and told me that they were very much together. After my meeting with her, I met up with him and ended the relationship. I moved and changed my telephone number. I didn't see or talk to him for five years. I was checking my MySpace account and received a note from one of our mutual friends a!
dvising me that Darryl wanted me to call him. I didn't respond to the note. Then, Darryl created his own MySpace page and reached out to me and told me that it was important. After five years of not speaking/seeing each other, I figured something must have been wrong. When I contacted him, he told me that for the past five years, I was all he thought about and that he had been in love with me the entire time. He also stated that he wanted to reconcile and eventually marry. I asked about his marital status and he stated that he was still married, but was not happy and wanted to divorce. I told him if this was the case, he should take care of that situation prior to being involved with me. I extended friendship and we remain friends. This year (June 09# I had been dealing with being unemployed since December 08. Times were extremely difficult for me. Darryl came into town #I live in No. VA) and stayed for two weeks. We spent every day together and we both realized that we cou!
ld no longer remain friends. I told him that I was still in love with him, but I could not entertain a friendship with him as it was extremely difficult to keep it platonic. When I told him this, he begged me to be a part of his life and to give him an opportunity to change his marital status. Reluctantly, I agreed.
how long did it last =: From June 2009 to November 2009.
how did it end =: After giving him four opportunities to seperate from his wife and him not making good on his word, I figured he was lying. The only way I could have found out the truth was to talk to her. I called her and advised her what was going on. Now she is saying I was trying to destroy her marriage.
would you do it again = : I love Darryl very much, but when his wife asked him if he loved me, he told her no. Aside from this, he had a baby outside of their marriage. He has known about the 6 year old child for 3 years and neglected to tell his wife. Based on his character, I will never be able to trust him. Even if he divorces, I do not see a future between him and I.
never done this before =: No. I knew he had had an affair outside of his marriage before. This was the second time we were together. Although the first time, I did not know he was still married. He has confided in me that he has had two additional affairs outside of his relationship with me.
did he have any kids =: He has three children. Two children with his wife. Well, I just recently found out that the 6 year old child he thought belonged to him, is not. He has two children with his wife. WHen I asked why he hadn't divorced during the time we were apart, he stated that he only stayed married because of his children.
did you know his wife before or gret to know her?: I did not "know" his wife. However, we did meet the first time Darryl and I were together. I didn't get to know her, but from our conversation 7 years ago, she was very kind and pleasant.
did you ever contact his wife = : This past November, I reached out to her because I felt he was lying to me about his marriage. He was telling me that he was very unhappy, that he never loved her, and that he only married her because she was pregnant. He stated that he hadn't left because of the children and because he really had no incentive to leave. He said when I gave him a second chance, he was going to make the step to seperate from her because I was the woman he loved. The fourth time I gave him the opportunity to take care of the situation, he told me it was hard because he didn't want to leave her in a bad situation with the kids. I thought the excuse was just an excuse and felt he was lying to me. The only way I would know the truth would be to contact her. When I contacted her, I told her the truth. I also told her the reasons behind me advising her of our affair. I honestly had no hopes that she would walk away and leave. I just needed a resolution to this issue!
. Being that I am a believer in Christ, I was extremely uncomfortable with the situation. I wanted to handle this properly without causing this woman grief. She accepted what I said, but later, accused me of trying to destroy her marriage. Which totally isn't the case. To prove what I told her and that I did not pursue her husband, I sent her surveys he and I did, which were handwritten by the both of us. I still feel it was the right choice to contact her because my heart was in the right place. I wanted to know the truth and I got the truth. Since that day, I have not reached out to him or her. If I were trying to destroy her marriage, I would still be in the picture. I wouldn't have told her to begin with.
spend a lot of money on you =: He didn't spend a lot of money on me. We went to dinner occasionally, but that is about it.
what did he promise you =: He promised me that he would leave. That is the only promise he made me. He told me often how much he loved me, that he wanted to have children with me, and that he wanted to marry me. He met my parents and friends. He intorduced to me to his friends. He incorporated me into his life as though he wasn't married.
did you want to marry him or just have the affair =: I wanted to marry him. I pressed him to seperate because I was uncomfortable dating a man who was married. Our relationship was never an "affair" (my though prior to me finding out the truth). He reached out to me and was telling me that he wanted to divorce her. It was under that pretense that I gave him a second chance. It was never I am with you just to be with you. It was I am with you because you are the woman I love. He often referred to me as his soul mate and second wife to his friends.
are you still in contact with him = : I am not. We broke up on November 9th, 09.
did you have an abortion or a child =: No children and no abortion.
did you date others =: I did not.
what advice would you give someone who is considering an affair? = : I would advise them to wait until the marriage is over. It only breeds pain and drama. Men will do anything to have their cake and eat it too. That includes them telling you they love you.
what advice would you give a wife whose husband was having an affair =: Do not blame the other woman. You never know what your husband has told her. There are women out there who truly have desires to destroy your marriage, but your husband has control over that. He is the one who made vows to you. As someone who was the "other woman" I am truly accountable for being involved with a man who was married. I feel so horrible that I played a role in causing another person pain. However, I did not have bad intentions. I gave the man I loved a chance to do what he said he wanted to do. I didn't know that him chasing me for two years was all a lie. I compromised myself and my beliefs for love and I feel that was my biggest mistake. I should have stuck to my guns. I would also tell the wife to see the situation for what it is. Blaming the other woman does not resolve the issues within your marriage. It only makes it worse. Regardless of what is transpiring within the marriage, adult!
erey is not the answer.
why do you tnink men have affairs =: In my particular situation, I am not sure WHY he had an affair with me. Although when his wife asked him if he loved me and he said no (although he had been telling me this for two years) I still believe otherwise. I believe he lied because he had so much to lose had he said yes. He makes a lot of money, so he said no to protect his assets. I don't know what was missing in his marriage, but I do know that he purposely stays on the road for months at a time. He doesn't want to go home to be around her. Whenever he was in town, he would go home to Raliegh and spend the weekend and to see his kids, but he would come up to NO. VA to see me and spend two weeks. I don't know.. I don't get it. I don't understand why he would chase me down the way he did, tell me all his inner-most feelings for two years, and then finally get what he said he wanted to just lie the way he did.
did you ever feel guilty about what you were doing -: I felt guilty every single day. Which is why I never let up about him seperating from his wife. It's what he said he wanted, so I made sure to stay on him about it. I can never do it again. IT's not who I am and I spent so many days/night in tears because of what I was doing to his wife. I even took the matter to my Pastor. I spoke to him while in the middle of our relationship because I was so distraught over hurting her and my relationship with God.
where how often regularly =: We didn't meet. He was always here at my house all the time. We weren't sneaking around or anything. He lives in Raliegh, NC and I live in Manassas, Va. They moved to Raligh four years ago, but their friends are all up here. He had me around their mutual friends and everything. Our relationship was never hidden.
did you tel did you tell friends or relatives =: Yes, everyone in my family and circle of friends knew. I don't hide my life. I try to be as honest as I can, especially to those I love and care for. Fortunately, none of them was upset with me. Everyone said he wasn't going to leave, but I felt differently. They were shocked that I would even entertain a man who was married, yet they understood the predicament due to my feelings for him. Many of them have met him and has seen and heard the things he said to me. Those who met him felt the same as I, that he was serious about what he wanted out his relationship with me.
what did you learn =: WAIT WAIT WAIT!!! If they say they are married, RUN AWAY! QUICKLY!!!
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Saturn/Pluto Square as Pluto Enters Capricorn
Now that Pluto entered Capriciorn, we'll be hearing from that amorphous thing called "The Collecive" more often and it will have a new voice. Often it sounds like a combination of the Church Lady and your Father when you know you're in big trouble.
Take for example the Tiger Woods scandal. The usual platitudes come out of Woods' mouth ("I let my family down" etc.) but i notice some shifting in the press' and bloggers' reactions. They are a little more cyncial, blase but also they are starting to question out loud and in this context whether men are monogamous and whether fidelity is still a good criterion for marriage.
Furthermore all the latest juicy transgressions have been by Republicans or members of the Establishment. It will be interesting to see if this is a trend. The Collective is by definition conservative.
Tiger Woods has Uranus stationary direct on his Descendant = wife gone bezerk = 7th house matter suddenly exposed.
How could he do this? The combination of Gemini and Scorpio can be a signature for leading a double life. It will be very hard of his Saturn in Leo and Ascendant in Virgo as there is a part of him that really wants to be Mr. Goody Two Shoes. Pluto is in Tiger Woods' 4th house with an inconjunct to Saturn in Leo - a complete self destruct where his image is concerned which could be costly with his endorsements and career.
Philippe Garrel'sSecond Saturn Return
French filmmaker Philippe Garrel comes into his own at h is second Saturn Return with the marvelous film, "Frontier of Dawn", starring his son.
Sunday, November 22, 2009
Are You Aware of the Dangers Lurking in Diet Drinks?
From: Dr. Hull's website. She asks you to share the word, so I am.
Aspartame Side Effects
The components of aspartame can lead to a number of health problems, as you have read. Side effects can occur gradually, can be immediate, or can be acute reactions.
According to Lendon Smith, M.D. there is an enormous population suffering from side effects associated with aspartame, yet have no idea why drugs, supplements and herbs don’t relieve their symptoms. Then, there are users who don’t ‘appear’ to suffer immediate reactions at all. Even these individuals are susceptible to the long-term damage caused by excitatory amino acids, phenylalanine, methanol, and DKP.
Adverse reactions and side effects of aspartame include:
Eye
blindness in one or both eyes
decreased vision and/or other eye problems such as: blurring, bright flashes, squiggly lines, tunnel vision, decreased night vision
pain in one or both eyes
decreased tears
trouble with contact lenses
bulging eyes
Ear
tinnitus - ringing or buzzing sound
severe intolerance of noise
marked hearing impairment
Neurologic
epileptic seizures
headaches, migraines and (some severe)
dizziness, unsteadiness, both
confusion, memory loss, both
severe drowsiness and sleepiness
paresthesia or numbness of the limbs
severe slurring of speech
severe hyperactivity and restless legs
atypical facial pain
severe tremors
Psychological/Psychiatric
severe depression
irritability
aggression
anxiety
personality changes
insomnia
phobias
Chest
palpitations, tachycardia
shortness of breath
recent high blood pressure
Gastrointestinal
nausea
diarrhea, sometimes with blood in stools
abdominal pain
pain when swallowing
Skin and Allergies
itching without a rash
lip and mouth reactions
hives
aggravated respiratory allergies such as asthma
Endocrine and Metabolic
loss of control of diabetes
menstrual changes
marked thinning or loss of hair
marked weight loss
gradual weight gain
aggravated low blood sugar (hypoglycemia)
severe PMS
Other
frequency of voiding and burning during urination
excessive thirst, fluid retention, leg swelling, and bloating
increased susceptibility to infection
Additional Symptoms of Aspartame Toxicity include the most critical symptoms of all
death
irreversible brain damage
birth defects, including mental retardation
peptic ulcers
aspartame addiction and increased craving for sweets
hyperactivity in children
severe depression
aggressive behavior
suicidal tendencies
Aspartame may trigger, mimic, or cause the following illnesses:
Chronic Fatigue Syndrome
Epstein-Barr
Post-Polio Syndrome
Lyme Disease
Grave’s Disease
Meniere’s Disease
Alzheimer’s Disease
ALS
Epilepsy
Multiple Sclerosis (MS)
EMS
Hypothyroidism
Mercury sensitivity from Amalgam fillings
Fibromyalgia
Lupus
non-Hodgkins
Lymphoma
Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD)
These are not allergies or sensitivities, but diseases and disease syndromes. Aspartame poisoning is commonly misdiagnosed because aspartame symptoms mock textbook ‘disease’ symptoms, such as Grave’s Disease.
Aspartame changes the ratio of amino acids in the blood, blocking or lowering the levels of serotonin, tyrosine, dopamine, norepinephrine, and adrenaline. Therefore, it is typical that aspartame symptoms cannot be detected in lab tests and on x-rays. Textbook disorders and diseases may actually be a toxic load as a result of aspartame poisoning.
Ever gone to the doctor with real, physical symptoms, but he/she can’t find the cause? Well, it’s probably your diet, your environment, or both.
Aspartame is the common denominator for over 92 different health symptoms at the root of modern disease. The Aspartame Detoxification Program demonstrates the most effective way to reverse disease symptoms is removing the underlying cause - aspartame.
I counsel aspartame victims worldwide and have witnessed nine out of 10 clients restore their health by following the Aspartame Detoxification Program. Begin with detoxifying your body of all residual chemical toxins from aspartame's chemical make up of phenylalanine, aspartic acid and methanol and their toxic by-products, and see if any adverse health symptoms remain. Try the Aspartame Detoxification Program, and within 30 days your symptoms should disappear.
Steps:
1.Remove all sugar-free products with aspartame from your diet.
2.Learn to 'read' your body. Begin recording any health changes.
3.Get a hair analysis.
4.Be happy with yourself.
5.Detoxify.
6.Restore depleted nutrients.
7.Exercise and get plenty of rest.
8.Eat 75% raw foods at every meal.
9.Drink water, water, water.
10.Get control of your life.
I designed this Ten Step Program to help protect your health and the health of those you love from being seduced by the sugar-free diet craze. Wishing you good health.
Wednesday, November 18, 2009
Nancy Fenn's Sympathetic Other Woman Survey
age =: 44
name for married lover: Chad
make up a name for you: Ellie
how did your relationship get started =: He was staying at the same hotel on business
how long did it last =: 3 mos
how did it end =: Wife found texts
would you do it again = : No
never done this before =: Yes. He had a 2 date fling 6 yrs. prior.
did he have any kids =: Yes. He had a 4 and 5 yr. old. Yes, he stated if it weren't for the kids he would be gone.
did you know his wife before or gret to know her?: No, I did not know her. We never met.
did you ever contact his wife = : No
spend a lot of money on you =: No
what did he promise you =: We were making future plans together. He arranged his work schedule to spend more time in my area. We were planning on my moving to his area next yr., organizing work plans and family plans around our ability to negotiate a relationship together.
did you want to marry him or just have the affair =: I wanted him. Absolutely. We made big plans together. He was tied to his wife by history, attachment and kids, but did not believe she was capable of loving him. No, I never pressed him for divorce.
are you still in contact with him = : No
name for married lover: Chad
make up a name for you: Ellie
how did your relationship get started =: He was staying at the same hotel on business
how long did it last =: 3 mos
how did it end =: Wife found texts
would you do it again = : No
never done this before =: Yes. He had a 2 date fling 6 yrs. prior.
did he have any kids =: Yes. He had a 4 and 5 yr. old. Yes, he stated if it weren't for the kids he would be gone.
did you know his wife before or gret to know her?: No, I did not know her. We never met.
did you ever contact his wife = : No
spend a lot of money on you =: No
what did he promise you =: We were making future plans together. He arranged his work schedule to spend more time in my area. We were planning on my moving to his area next yr., organizing work plans and family plans around our ability to negotiate a relationship together.
did you want to marry him or just have the affair =: I wanted him. Absolutely. We made big plans together. He was tied to his wife by history, attachment and kids, but did not believe she was capable of loving him. No, I never pressed him for divorce.
are you still in contact with him = : No
Tuesday, November 17, 2009
Michael Lutin's Ode to Scorpios
new moon in scorpio
Scorpio rules necrophiles and varied sexofreaks,
God when he's creative or mad,
A good many Arabs, Italians and Greeks,
And little girls who wanna be bad.
The go-go dancer clad in just a feather
Dramas that are played out in bed,
Dominating sadists in leather,
And millions of not so grateful dead.
Pickles cigars and long hard tools
Jack hammers rifles and drills
Places you hide the family jewels
Condoms and birth control pills.
Forty- second street on Saturday night,
Sickies who want to be destroyed,
People who hold your letters up to the light,
And EVERYTHING according to Freud.
Doctors and butchers are under this sign,
And fins that stick out of the sea,
Snow White's Stepmother and Frankenstein,
Roseanne Barr and DeSade the Marquis.
Hijackers, hookers,
Kidnappers Looters,
Blue jeans and gorgeous behinds,
The guys who clean your drains with their roto- rooters,
And don't forget johns of all kinds.
Footsteps behind you that quicken their pace,
Motels and nighttime raids,
A nylon stocking over your face,
Herpes, Clamydia, Aids.
Then of course there are plagues bubonic,
Twenty years of three packs a day,
All the forces you'd consider demonic,
Plus the power to throw your cigarettes away.
The strength to swim an icy river,
The courage of a fiery red ant,
The magic to grow back your liver,
The rage when they tell you you can't.
They kid they told, ‘We're sorry , but it's Cancer,"
The woman who had six months left on Earth.
Five years down the road, the kid's a dancer,
Ten years later SHE's still giving birth.
So if we turn to missile deployment,
When the pumpkins have replaced all the coaches,
When it's one hundred percent unemployment,
And there's nothing left but ringing phones and roaches,
Who's' gonna make it through the mushroom cloud,
Laughing at apocalyptic jive?
Who will roll the stone away and tear off the shroud?
Who's gonna keep this world alive?
What gives a peach tree peaches?
What fills the space between the stars?
What happens all along moonlit beaches
And sometimes late at night in bars?
Scorpio, my Friend, Scorpio.
Now playing everywhere.
And don't you forget it.
Scorpio rules necrophiles and varied sexofreaks,
God when he's creative or mad,
A good many Arabs, Italians and Greeks,
And little girls who wanna be bad.
The go-go dancer clad in just a feather
Dramas that are played out in bed,
Dominating sadists in leather,
And millions of not so grateful dead.
Pickles cigars and long hard tools
Jack hammers rifles and drills
Places you hide the family jewels
Condoms and birth control pills.
Forty- second street on Saturday night,
Sickies who want to be destroyed,
People who hold your letters up to the light,
And EVERYTHING according to Freud.
Doctors and butchers are under this sign,
And fins that stick out of the sea,
Snow White's Stepmother and Frankenstein,
Roseanne Barr and DeSade the Marquis.
Hijackers, hookers,
Kidnappers Looters,
Blue jeans and gorgeous behinds,
The guys who clean your drains with their roto- rooters,
And don't forget johns of all kinds.
Footsteps behind you that quicken their pace,
Motels and nighttime raids,
A nylon stocking over your face,
Herpes, Clamydia, Aids.
Then of course there are plagues bubonic,
Twenty years of three packs a day,
All the forces you'd consider demonic,
Plus the power to throw your cigarettes away.
The strength to swim an icy river,
The courage of a fiery red ant,
The magic to grow back your liver,
The rage when they tell you you can't.
They kid they told, ‘We're sorry , but it's Cancer,"
The woman who had six months left on Earth.
Five years down the road, the kid's a dancer,
Ten years later SHE's still giving birth.
So if we turn to missile deployment,
When the pumpkins have replaced all the coaches,
When it's one hundred percent unemployment,
And there's nothing left but ringing phones and roaches,
Who's' gonna make it through the mushroom cloud,
Laughing at apocalyptic jive?
Who will roll the stone away and tear off the shroud?
Who's gonna keep this world alive?
What gives a peach tree peaches?
What fills the space between the stars?
What happens all along moonlit beaches
And sometimes late at night in bars?
Scorpio, my Friend, Scorpio.
Now playing everywhere.
And don't you forget it.
Sunday, November 15, 2009
Manny Pacquaio's Birth Chart and HHoroscope
Read about the amazing Manny Pacquiao and learn from his astrology chart. What makes a
superstar athlete, politician actor, filmmaker and recording industry success?
Manny Pacquiao defeated Miguel Cotto today.
Quote from wiki:
The Filipino boxing superstar is the first boxer to win seven world titles in seven different weight divisions.In addition, he is the first and only boxer to win the lineal championship ("the man who beat the man who beat the man") in four different weight classes. Aside fro...m being a boxer, Pacquiao has participated in politics, acting, filmmaking, and music recording.
See Manny's chart.
This multifacetted individual is having an incredible Saturn Return experience.
Real name Emmanuel Dapidran Pacquiao
Nickname(s)
Pac-Man
Fighting Pride of the Philippines
The Mexicutioner
Ang Pambansang Kamao (The National Fist)
Pretty Boy Assassin
Tuesday, November 10, 2009
Introverts are not Bad and Wrong!
From KJ:
Wow... here I was just trying to understand why noise and disruption at work push me to the the point of getting not just irritated but angry.
Started perusing your site and bookmarked it... wow... I always knew I was an introvert based on Myers Briggs tests (INTJ) but to read the experiences from other introverts... wow... maybe I'm not so nuts/neurotic and this is just a big part of who I am... and the conflict always comes from trying to NOT be that because well meaning people around me push me to be more extroverted, which invariably throws me terribly out of whack.
I'm going to be all over your site (at work right now) later on because this site is explaining a LOT about who I just inherently am, and that it's not wrong or bad...
Please visit www.theintrovertzcoach.com for articles and resources.
Wow... here I was just trying to understand why noise and disruption at work push me to the the point of getting not just irritated but angry.
Started perusing your site and bookmarked it... wow... I always knew I was an introvert based on Myers Briggs tests (INTJ) but to read the experiences from other introverts... wow... maybe I'm not so nuts/neurotic and this is just a big part of who I am... and the conflict always comes from trying to NOT be that because well meaning people around me push me to be more extroverted, which invariably throws me terribly out of whack.
I'm going to be all over your site (at work right now) later on because this site is explaining a LOT about who I just inherently am, and that it's not wrong or bad...
Please visit www.theintrovertzcoach.com for articles and resources.
Friday, November 6, 2009
Families
From NB
"Families have no privileged status as relationships for me. They can be -- probably are -- the most potentially destructive, violent spaces of any. "To paidi mou" or "e mana mou" can be the three scariest words in the world for me, and the justification for some of the blindest, most horrendous selfishness imaginable."
"To paidi mou" and "e mana mou" means "my child" "my mother"
"Families have no privileged status as relationships for me. They can be -- probably are -- the most potentially destructive, violent spaces of any. "To paidi mou" or "e mana mou" can be the three scariest words in the world for me, and the justification for some of the blindest, most horrendous selfishness imaginable."
"To paidi mou" and "e mana mou" means "my child" "my mother"
Wednesday, November 4, 2009
Crisis
Astrologer Robert Hand once described crisis as “a moment in which the past has the least hold on the present and the present has a maximum hold on the future.”
Getting Introverts to T alk
We were asked by the S.W.A.T. team officer:
My name is XXX and I am a SWAT negotiator with the XXX Police Department. One of my jobs is to find new recourse's and training for the negotiation team. Your article intrigued me because we often deal with people who are non responsive and show very introverted traits.
It is essential that we communicate with people in crisis regardless if they are introverts or not. Often times when my team arrives at a scene, the person in crisis does not want to respond.
Do you have any additional information on how to break the ice with Introverts?
How to get people to start talking with us when they're in crisis?
Thank you for your time,
XXx XXXPolice Department HNT Team
Our answer on behalf of introverts everywhere ...
This is from my technical, spiritual and menu advisor Dave who taught me everything I know about MBTI!!.
>
Relative to MBTI types, there are two distinct types of Introverts. The Introverted Sensing types will always notice and (hopefully) recall more data than any police officer needs. They observe and remember everything and only need to be made to feel like they are part of the team in order to share this information. Of course, you can't make them part of the team if you bully them or pressure them. This is especially true of ISTP/ISFP's. Judging types tend to naturally understand the need for order and closure.
Introverted Intuitive types are more of a problem since they are not naturally very aware of their surroundings. They might not even notice key details that could provide helpful information to the police. It is very hard to share information that you never collected. Fortunately, only a very small percentage of the population are IN-types.
Lets use an example here. Bad guys try to rob a bank, cops show up - hostage situation at hand. Bad guys released 12 Introverted hostages in good faith. Police need to interview the released hostages. All 10 of the IS types notice what the bad guys were wearing, how many guns they had, how much ammo they had, whether their nails were dirty or they needed a shave.
In the back of their minds, the ISTP/ISFP Artisans would take this robbery personal. The ISTJ/ISFJ Guardians would view it as an attack on the system (that they love).
The Introverted Intuitive would look at it from a broader perspective.
The lone INFP is probably wondering why they were robbing the bank for in the first place, why would they pick that bank, wonder about the bad guys family life, what drove them to crime, etc. The INTJ is wondering why they would rob a bank so close to a police station, and why they didn't have a better getaway plan. The INTJ just knew they could do a better job robbing a bank.
Obviously, this is a gross exaggeration - but it does make my point.
Information is not the same thing for everyone. This is a very important consideration.
My take on this is that you are pretty much on the money except it might not hurt to consider the shadow personality thing. Fear can make Extroverts clam up tight as a drum. It call also make Introverts talkative. The most important thing to do is take fear out of the equation for Extroverts and to allow the shadow side of the Introvert to show itself. I would not decrease the pressure on the Introverts - I would increase it. Of course, I am a prick sometimes. Let me re-state that. I think that all of what you suggested in great, especially the part about the calming voice, creating a comfortable atmosphere and even a being able to write down thoughts. It is always a good idea to give an Introvert a notepad to write on as you are asking questions. These same things should all work well with Extroverts too, in my untrained opinion, as you are trying to calm and manage their energy.
If the above doesn't work, then I would push really hard. Introverts will usually revert into themselves under pressure - they will find their comfort zone and hide there for long periods of time. To extract information, you need to push them out of their comfort zone by being demanding and intruding. The only sure way to get them out of their space is for you to get into it and push them out. This will lead to a lot of bad feelings and resentment - but it is quick and effective.
I hope this helps. Thanks for sharing with me...
Dave
These are my suggestions that he is referring. Take what you like and leave the rest. “Intention” always rules! As my grandmother used to say, “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”
First and foremost, mirror their body language EXACTLY. Continue to do this throughout your time together.
> 2. Have several people to choose from including at least one woman. Ask them, “Who (which one)do you want to stay here with you?” Use
> those exact words, don’t mention talking.
> 3. Give good eye contact one time (make sure it happens) and then look down or away for the rest of the time.
> 4. Keep your voice well modulated (no quasi military bullshit)
> 5. Say “we” instead of “I”
> 6. “We need some information. It will be days before you can really organize your thoughts, we understand, so you can answer one-word answers and we’ll let you write it out for us later or come by and hear the whole story and exactly how it happened in a few days. For now it’s ok to just answer in one word. Ok? It’s ok if you need to cry, too, or smoke or anything you need to do, ok, we can still understand your words. Nod your head when you’re ready ... when we can begin, ok. One word is all we need. We’ll help you with the rest.” [I am purposely using vague and winding language so s/he can get used to the sound of my voice. At a crisis situation sounds are horrifying to an introvert, way too much noise and stimulation. Use your voice to calm the person down.]
7. Especially the aforementioned infp type will want to know no one will be shot or convicted on the basis of information they came up with on the spur of the moment and under duress.
> 7. “Would you like to continue somewhere else?” Introverts are very territorial and very sensitive to their surroundings. They may overtly want you off of their property or out of their living space before they can calm down.
> 8. “Would you like me to hold your hand?” Expect an emphatic yes or no and don’t take it personally – there are 4 different types of introverts.
> 9. In every group of people there is always someone with a calming VOICE. Be on the lookout for this person and try to recruit them L OL
> 10. “All we need is for you to do your best with your one or two word answers. We’ll let you correct it all later if you need to. Just do your best.”
>
> Regarding people one-step removed from the crisis
> 11. IF the person isn’t directly involved in the situation convince them how IMPORTANT it is. Introverts hate small talk and won’t say anything if it isn’t going to be taken seriously.. “Lives have been saved by seemingly casual information from bystanders like you.” “We feel you may have critical information to add to the big picture .....”
My name is XXX and I am a SWAT negotiator with the XXX Police Department. One of my jobs is to find new recourse's and training for the negotiation team. Your article intrigued me because we often deal with people who are non responsive and show very introverted traits.
It is essential that we communicate with people in crisis regardless if they are introverts or not. Often times when my team arrives at a scene, the person in crisis does not want to respond.
Do you have any additional information on how to break the ice with Introverts?
How to get people to start talking with us when they're in crisis?
Thank you for your time,
XXx XXXPolice Department HNT Team
Our answer on behalf of introverts everywhere ...
This is from my technical, spiritual and menu advisor Dave who taught me everything I know about MBTI!!.
>
Relative to MBTI types, there are two distinct types of Introverts. The Introverted Sensing types will always notice and (hopefully) recall more data than any police officer needs. They observe and remember everything and only need to be made to feel like they are part of the team in order to share this information. Of course, you can't make them part of the team if you bully them or pressure them. This is especially true of ISTP/ISFP's. Judging types tend to naturally understand the need for order and closure.
Introverted Intuitive types are more of a problem since they are not naturally very aware of their surroundings. They might not even notice key details that could provide helpful information to the police. It is very hard to share information that you never collected. Fortunately, only a very small percentage of the population are IN-types.
Lets use an example here. Bad guys try to rob a bank, cops show up - hostage situation at hand. Bad guys released 12 Introverted hostages in good faith. Police need to interview the released hostages. All 10 of the IS types notice what the bad guys were wearing, how many guns they had, how much ammo they had, whether their nails were dirty or they needed a shave.
In the back of their minds, the ISTP/ISFP Artisans would take this robbery personal. The ISTJ/ISFJ Guardians would view it as an attack on the system (that they love).
The Introverted Intuitive would look at it from a broader perspective.
The lone INFP is probably wondering why they were robbing the bank for in the first place, why would they pick that bank, wonder about the bad guys family life, what drove them to crime, etc. The INTJ is wondering why they would rob a bank so close to a police station, and why they didn't have a better getaway plan. The INTJ just knew they could do a better job robbing a bank.
Obviously, this is a gross exaggeration - but it does make my point.
Information is not the same thing for everyone. This is a very important consideration.
My take on this is that you are pretty much on the money except it might not hurt to consider the shadow personality thing. Fear can make Extroverts clam up tight as a drum. It call also make Introverts talkative. The most important thing to do is take fear out of the equation for Extroverts and to allow the shadow side of the Introvert to show itself. I would not decrease the pressure on the Introverts - I would increase it. Of course, I am a prick sometimes. Let me re-state that. I think that all of what you suggested in great, especially the part about the calming voice, creating a comfortable atmosphere and even a being able to write down thoughts. It is always a good idea to give an Introvert a notepad to write on as you are asking questions. These same things should all work well with Extroverts too, in my untrained opinion, as you are trying to calm and manage their energy.
If the above doesn't work, then I would push really hard. Introverts will usually revert into themselves under pressure - they will find their comfort zone and hide there for long periods of time. To extract information, you need to push them out of their comfort zone by being demanding and intruding. The only sure way to get them out of their space is for you to get into it and push them out. This will lead to a lot of bad feelings and resentment - but it is quick and effective.
I hope this helps. Thanks for sharing with me...
Dave
These are my suggestions that he is referring. Take what you like and leave the rest. “Intention” always rules! As my grandmother used to say, “Where there’s a will, there’s a way.”
First and foremost, mirror their body language EXACTLY. Continue to do this throughout your time together.
> 2. Have several people to choose from including at least one woman. Ask them, “Who (which one)do you want to stay here with you?” Use
> those exact words, don’t mention talking.
> 3. Give good eye contact one time (make sure it happens) and then look down or away for the rest of the time.
> 4. Keep your voice well modulated (no quasi military bullshit)
> 5. Say “we” instead of “I”
> 6. “We need some information. It will be days before you can really organize your thoughts, we understand, so you can answer one-word answers and we’ll let you write it out for us later or come by and hear the whole story and exactly how it happened in a few days. For now it’s ok to just answer in one word. Ok? It’s ok if you need to cry, too, or smoke or anything you need to do, ok, we can still understand your words. Nod your head when you’re ready ... when we can begin, ok. One word is all we need. We’ll help you with the rest.” [I am purposely using vague and winding language so s/he can get used to the sound of my voice. At a crisis situation sounds are horrifying to an introvert, way too much noise and stimulation. Use your voice to calm the person down.]
7. Especially the aforementioned infp type will want to know no one will be shot or convicted on the basis of information they came up with on the spur of the moment and under duress.
> 7. “Would you like to continue somewhere else?” Introverts are very territorial and very sensitive to their surroundings. They may overtly want you off of their property or out of their living space before they can calm down.
> 8. “Would you like me to hold your hand?” Expect an emphatic yes or no and don’t take it personally – there are 4 different types of introverts.
> 9. In every group of people there is always someone with a calming VOICE. Be on the lookout for this person and try to recruit them L OL
> 10. “All we need is for you to do your best with your one or two word answers. We’ll let you correct it all later if you need to. Just do your best.”
>
> Regarding people one-step removed from the crisis
> 11. IF the person isn’t directly involved in the situation convince them how IMPORTANT it is. Introverts hate small talk and won’t say anything if it isn’t going to be taken seriously.. “Lives have been saved by seemingly casual information from bystanders like you.” “We feel you may have critical information to add to the big picture .....”
Thursday, October 29, 2009
Saturn enters Libr
As Saturn enters Libra for the first time in 30 years, you’ll hear one astrologer after another tell you it’s all about relationships. It’s not. It’s all about integrity of the self.
How many “different people” are you? How often have you sold out to be popular or well liked? Are you consistent about what you tell people or do you talk behind someone’s back? When was the last time you triangulated? Do you talk out both sides of your mouth? Do you promise mo re than you can deliver?
Time to clean up your act.
How many “different people” are you? How often have you sold out to be popular or well liked? Are you consistent about what you tell people or do you talk behind someone’s back? When was the last time you triangulated? Do you talk out both sides of your mouth? Do you promise mo re than you can deliver?
Time to clean up your act.
Wednesday, October 28, 2009
Words to DEM MILNERS TRERN, a Yiddish Folk Song
A friend gave me the words to Dem Milners Trern, theYiddish folk song they played at the end of the Coen Brothers' new film, "A Serious Man".
THE MILLER’S TEARS
Oh, how many years have gone by,
Since I am miller here?
The wheels (of the mill) are turning,
The years are passing,
I’m already old and gray.
There are days when I try to remember,
If I ever had a bit of luck.
The wheels are turning,
The years are passing,
No answer comes back to me.
I have heard them say,
they want to drive me,
From the town and from the mill,
The wheels are turning,
The years are passing,
Without an end and without a goal.
Where will I live?
Who will look after of me?
I’m already old,
I’m already tired.T
he wheels are turning
The years are passing,
And together with them,
the Jew is dying.
Wednesday, October 21, 2009
What about the Stock Market November 17th?
Incredibly, the North Node of the New York Stock Exchange is only 1 degree from Saturn's ingress into Libra and its progressed Sun is right at Pluto's position in Capricorn. The square takes place between 3rd and 5th houses. Certainly it's time for a "new face" but what else will happen?
Relative to the upcoming Saturn square Pluto transit ... I'm wondering about the stock market. Which way will it go?
Follow my blog or catch me on facebook for updates.
Executive and EQ Coach Susan Dunn said, "The stock market is the most emotional thing there is."
In 1982 at the beginning of the current world order (Saturn conjunct Pluto in Libra) there was a 9 year high followed by a short but deep reccession.
Harvey Pitt was appointed SEC Chairman at crisis or turning point when Pluto in Sagittarius opposed Saturn in Gemini in 2001. This is the halffway point in any cycle like the Full Moon. I think Harvey would agree!!
Take a look at the more complete history and more charts of the New York Stock Exchange.
The North Node of the NY Stock Exchange is at 2 degrees Libra -- amazing. Just 1 degree away from Saturn's ingress into Libra. Its progressed Sun is conjunct transiting Pluto.
Here is the only complete and accurate listing of this cycle's dates on the internet. Most of the transits lasted 2 years:
1982 conjunct in Libra
1989 Saturn in Capricorn separating sextile Pluto in Scorpio
1993 Saturn in Aquarius separating square Pluto in Scorpio - Leavitt appointed
1997 Saturn in Aries trine Pluto in Sagittarius - let the good times roll
2002 Saturn in Gemini opposite Pluto in Sagittarius - enter Harvey Pitt
2007 Saturn in Leo trine Pluto in Sagittarius
2009 Saturn in Libra culminating square Pluto in Capricorn - only the Shadow knows at this poinnt but stay tuned as I will try to "call it" before Nov. 1
2013 Saturn in Scorpio culminating sextile Pluto in Capricorn
2020 conjunct in Capricorn
Arthur Leavitt was appointed SEC Charman in 1993 for a long dynamic term befitting a separating square; however all the later troubles incubated there! Leavitt's communicative "take it to the people" style fit the Aquarius aspect under which he took office.
Harvey Pitt's short, volatile term in office followed in 2001 just as Saturn faced off against Pluto. It was at a the turning point of this gigantic far reaching cycle. If this were a Verdi opera the music would be wratched up unbearably as Pitt walked onto the stage to sing a bass solo aria of incredibly ominous tension yet he is the hero not the villain! The whole term could be characterized as "crisis management" as it included 911 (days after taking office) and Enron and son of Enron and son of son of ... LOL ... and maybe even son of Wrath of Khan ... which is what Pitt does at is Kalorama Partners firm in DC and NY, crisis management. I espouse Adam Smith's "Invisible Hand" theory -- if only we had eyes to see we'd notice that history always gives us the right person.
Relative to the upcoming Saturn square Pluto transit ... I'm wondering about the stock market. Which way will it go?
Follow my blog or catch me on facebook for updates.
Executive and EQ Coach Susan Dunn said, "The stock market is the most emotional thing there is."
In 1982 at the beginning of the current world order (Saturn conjunct Pluto in Libra) there was a 9 year high followed by a short but deep reccession.
Harvey Pitt was appointed SEC Chairman at crisis or turning point when Pluto in Sagittarius opposed Saturn in Gemini in 2001. This is the halffway point in any cycle like the Full Moon. I think Harvey would agree!!
Take a look at the more complete history and more charts of the New York Stock Exchange.
The North Node of the NY Stock Exchange is at 2 degrees Libra -- amazing. Just 1 degree away from Saturn's ingress into Libra. Its progressed Sun is conjunct transiting Pluto.
Here is the only complete and accurate listing of this cycle's dates on the internet. Most of the transits lasted 2 years:
1982 conjunct in Libra
1989 Saturn in Capricorn separating sextile Pluto in Scorpio
1993 Saturn in Aquarius separating square Pluto in Scorpio - Leavitt appointed
1997 Saturn in Aries trine Pluto in Sagittarius - let the good times roll
2002 Saturn in Gemini opposite Pluto in Sagittarius - enter Harvey Pitt
2007 Saturn in Leo trine Pluto in Sagittarius
2009 Saturn in Libra culminating square Pluto in Capricorn - only the Shadow knows at this poinnt but stay tuned as I will try to "call it" before Nov. 1
2013 Saturn in Scorpio culminating sextile Pluto in Capricorn
2020 conjunct in Capricorn
Arthur Leavitt was appointed SEC Charman in 1993 for a long dynamic term befitting a separating square; however all the later troubles incubated there! Leavitt's communicative "take it to the people" style fit the Aquarius aspect under which he took office.
Harvey Pitt's short, volatile term in office followed in 2001 just as Saturn faced off against Pluto. It was at a the turning point of this gigantic far reaching cycle. If this were a Verdi opera the music would be wratched up unbearably as Pitt walked onto the stage to sing a bass solo aria of incredibly ominous tension yet he is the hero not the villain! The whole term could be characterized as "crisis management" as it included 911 (days after taking office) and Enron and son of Enron and son of son of ... LOL ... and maybe even son of Wrath of Khan ... which is what Pitt does at is Kalorama Partners firm in DC and NY, crisis management. I espouse Adam Smith's "Invisible Hand" theory -- if only we had eyes to see we'd notice that history always gives us the right person.
Tuesday, October 20, 2009
Dates for Current Saturn/Pluto Cycle
1982 conjunct in Libra
1989 Saturn in Capricorn separating sextile Pluto in Scorpio
1993 Saturn in Aquarius separating square Pluto in Scorpio
1997 Saturn in Aries trine Pluto in Sagittarius
2002 Saturn in Gemini opposite Pluto in Sagittarius
2007 Saturn in Leo trine Pluto in Sagittarius
2009 Saturn in Libra culminating square Pluto in Capricorn
2013 Saturn in Scorpio culminating sextile Pluto in Capricorn
2020 conjunct in Capricorn
Check back for more details or order your personalized report for $50 nancy@bemyguide.net
1989 Saturn in Capricorn separating sextile Pluto in Scorpio
1993 Saturn in Aquarius separating square Pluto in Scorpio
1997 Saturn in Aries trine Pluto in Sagittarius
2002 Saturn in Gemini opposite Pluto in Sagittarius
2007 Saturn in Leo trine Pluto in Sagittarius
2009 Saturn in Libra culminating square Pluto in Capricorn
2013 Saturn in Scorpio culminating sextile Pluto in Capricorn
2020 conjunct in Capricorn
Check back for more details or order your personalized report for $50 nancy@bemyguide.net
Monday, October 19, 2009
The Saturn/Pluto Square Transit
November 15th, the two heaviest planets, Saturn and Pluto, meet to duke it out, resolving a quarrel which began to develop after they met back in 1982 and had some good times establishing a new world order.
This aspect will return January 31, 2010 and August 21, 2101.
There may or may not be repercussions in the world but I want you to look at YOUR world, your life, the sphere of events that are personal to you.
Here's what was happening in the world.
Falklands War
Canadian Independence
Spain joins NATO
Israel invades Lebanon, Lebanese Civil War, Israel return Sinai to Egypt
Fahd becomes King of Saudi Arabia upon the death of his brother Khalid
Prince William is born
Sun Myung Moon is busted
Mexico announces it is unable to pay its large foreign debt triggering a debt crisis throughout Latin America
Lebanese president assassinated
US Savings and Loan Industry deregulated
Dow Jones reaches a 9-year high
The Peoples Republic of China adopts its current constitution
Compact discs first introduced in Germany
Times “Man of the Year” is the computer
Freeware was first introduced
Times Beach, Missouri evacuated
A brief but severe recession begins in the US
King Sobhuza II of Swaziland died, at the time the longest reigning living monarch
Leonid Brezhnev dies in office
Michael Jackson introduced “Thriller”
So watch the news for these players : China, Lebanon, Canada and Spain, change of power in Russia and Saudi Arabia, another devaluation of the peso in Mexico??
Look for major news events around Prince William, possibly the death or abdication of his grandmother. There is tremendous pressure on his chart in the next year or so. To a lesser degrree we may see Jessica Biel and Kirten Dunst in the news. Michael Jackson has already been in the news. Expect a lot in the news about gurus, good and bad.
I encourage you to think how you can connect these dots because it will develop your intuitive muscle (therefore your spirituality) and it should also reveal some of the otherwise veiled connections between events that give you an inkling of the workings of the universe and meaning to events in your personal life. The world’s greatest economist, Adam Smith, called this “the Invisible Hand”.
So where were you in 1982?
In 1982 my whole world sure changed. My dad died in 1980 and my mother was pronounced terminal in 1982.
Sunday, October 18, 2009
My FAvorite Poem
Sundays too my father got up early
And put his clothes on in the blueback cold,
then with cracked hands that ached from labor
in the weekday weather made banked fires blaze.
No one ever thanked him.
I'd wake and hear the cold splintering, breaking.
When the rooms were warm,
he'd call, and slowly I would rise and dress,
fearing the chronic angers of that house,
Speaking indifferently to him,
who had driven out the cold
and polished my good shoes as well.
What did I know, what did I know
of love's austere and lonely offices?
- Robert Hayden, Those Winter Sundays.
Saturn Return in Libra for Tennis World
The tennis world is in for a shakeup with World Ranked #1 Male Roger Federer, Anna Kournakova, Andy Roddick and World Ranked #1 Female Serena Williams all having their Saturn Returns in Libra.
[Photo of Serena from wiki.]
Roger Federer's Saturn Return
"[Roger] Federer has won 15 Grand Slam singles titles, more than any other male player. He is one of six male players to have captured the career Grand Slam. Federer has appeared in an unprecedented 21 career Grand Slam finals, and as of September 2009, has reached the semi-finals or better of the last 22 Grand Slam tournaments, a streak that spans over five years.[12] Federer also holds the record of reaching 10 consecutive Grand Slam finals and has appeared in 17 of the last 18." [wiki]
Roger Federer has Saturn at 6 degrees Libra and his Saturn Return changes have already begun. He has been losing matches for the first time. He has become the father of twins. What will happen next?
[Roger Federer's birth chart f rom astrotheme.com.]
And what will happen to you?. Were you born between September 22, 1980 and November 29, 1982 or Nvember 20, 1950 through November 22, 1953? Check my website for more infiormation.
Prince William's Saturn Return in Libra and BIrth Chart
Prince William has his Saturn at 15 degrees in Libra. His Sun and Moon are currently opposed by tr Pluto. Look for his name in headlines; a very stressful Saturn Return.
Here is Prince William's birth chart from astrotheme.com
Look for my Saturn Return in Libra Series.
Saturday, October 17, 2009
The Sympathetic "Other Woman" Suruvey
=: 55
name for married lover: Frank
make up a name for you: Kim
how did your relationship get started =: At work
how long did it last =: 9 years
how did it end =: His wife wanted to move to North Carolina to get a fresh start. So he moved with her and his two kids
would you do it again = : Never in a million years
never done this before =: It was his second time remarrying her. He did it to her the first time around and they divorced. I was the second time around woman
did he have any kids =: he has two kids 13 and 18 and he did say many times he was in the marriage for the kids. He had to think of his kids.
did you know his wife before or gret to know her?: I met his wife a few times here and there but never got to know her.
did you ever contact his wife = : I sent a letter to her three brothers telling them about the affair. I devasted the whole family. I was the wrong choice. I did it in anger. I did it because after he moved away he continued to contact me. Telling me he missed me loved me wanted to see me so badly. He requested naked pictures of me repeatedly. Then he continued to tell me bad things about his wife how she was treating him. I got so angry one day I couldn't take it anymore so I wrote the letter and sent a copy of his email requesting the pictures of me.
did you ever contact his wife = : I sent a letter to her three brothers telling them about the affair. I devasted the whole family. I was the wrong choice. I did it in anger. I did it because after he moved away he continued to contact me. Telling me he missed me loved me wanted to see me so badly. He requested naked pictures of me repeatedly. Then he continued to tell me bad things about his wife how she was treating him. I got so angry one day I couldn't take it anymore so I wrote the letter and sent a copy of his email requesting the pictures of me.
spend a lot of money on you =: No money nothing ever....
what did he promise you =: He promised he was leaving his wife many many times and that we would be together someday.
did you want to marry him or just have the affair =: I wanted to marry him and I did press him to leave North Carolina and come back to be with me.
are you still in contact with him = : I have tried to stop contact repeately I changed my numbers and then gave them back to him.. I am again trying. I have changed my cell phone and work phone has been changed but he still has my home phone. I have blocked his emails and chat and facebook.
did you have an abortion or a child =: no
did you date others =: yes
what advice would you give someone who is considering an affair? = : Please don't ever do it. It is so very painful sometimes you will want to die. There were days I was so depressed crying all day many times. He has no regard for you at all he will lie and lie and lie just to keep you and her. He wants you both. Run like the wind from a married man....
what advice would you give a wife whose husband was having an affair =: He is lying to her and will continue to lie just to be with the mistress. He is addicted just like a drug or alcohol. He will bounce her around she should think of leaving him or if he is willing go to counseling because there are things that are wrong in the marriage and the mistress is just the product of it all.
why do you tnink men have affairs =: He said she criticized everything he did. She was not affectionate. Everything had to be her way in the house he had no say in anything. I think I made him feel like he was unconditionally loved by me and I never criticized him or tried to change him.
why do you tnink men have affairs =: He said she criticized everything he did. She was not affectionate. Everything had to be her way in the house he had no say in anything. I think I made him feel like he was unconditionally loved by me and I never criticized him or tried to change him.
did you ever feel guilty about what you were doing -: Not really I hated the wife. He told me such terrible things about her and the way she treated him I never felt guilty not one second.
where how often regularly =: In my office, at his house when his wife was not home, on breaks it was random
did you tel did you tell friends or relatives =: I told everyone. They were just concerned that I was not going to get hurt. They didn't want to see that
what did you learn =: Well, I learned that I am a good person and I deserve to #1 not #2 or #3 and I will settle for nothing less anymore. I went thru such pain, emotionally because I fell deeply in love with him. I still love him to this day. I am ready to move on tough. What amazes me is that he still trys to contact me even though his wife watches his every move and that he continues to stay in a bad marriage and that she continues to stay in a bad marriage knowing her husband has been unfaithful. What also amazes me is how a person could lie so much to everyone. I could write a book really what I have told you is just a dot on a pages and pages of this relationship
Wednesday, October 14, 2009
Boomers on MEdicare
If you're a Boomer going on Medicare in the next few years ... here's the man to thank!!
Lyndon Baines Johnson [photo from wiki]
Tuesday, October 13, 2009
The Sympathetic "Other Woman" Survey
me for married lover: Edward
make up a name for you: Anne
how did your relationship get started =: He and I worked together, he started showing interest in my single life, caring about who I was spending time with, encouraging me not to settle and then started offering to help me fix things around my house so I would not have to hire someone, he called me and wished me happy weekend, made excuses to see me on jobs, then one day said he was spending so much time around me because he wanted to be around me and that he had settled in his less than 3 yr 2nd marraige and that he did not want me to settle. He expressed a struggle in how he could get out of the commitment he made with this 2nd wife and if he did divorce her how would I ever trust him?
how long did it last =: 2-1/2 yrs. A couple of times he left me and usually it was holidays and summers when family was around, but he always came back crying about how he did not want to lose me, he only saw his future with me, he did not see himself staying with wife forever,and he was trying to get it all figured out in his head how to justify divorce.
how did it end =: He finally went to talk to a pastor to explain his feelings for me and how he saw his future with me and how he had never loved or desired another the way he did with me and the pastor told him what he was doing was wrong and that his future was not with me,but with his wife. He told me he could not justify divorcing her no matter how much he wanted me and us and that it would haunt him forever if he walked out on her. He said that she may have his name but I have his heart and he said I knew the truth and he was only doing what he felt led by God to do,which was stay married and stay in the life he signed up for no matter how selfish his feelings were that he wanted to be with me.
would you do it again = : No
never done this before =: No he had never done this. I believe him.
did he have any kids =: He had custody of two kids from previous marriage. He said his struggle was how to role model making a commitment to a wife in front of God and then in less than 3 years, saying it is ok to change your mind. He said he wanted to leave a legacy to his sons of how to always do the right thing.
did you know his wife before or gret to know her?: No I did not know her. I met her once but would not have recognized her in a crowd.
did you ever contact his wife = : I wrote her a long email and told her all the truth. She was shocked. She had suspected previously and found some emails he wrote to me. But he told her he would stay away from me and honor his commitment to their marriage. But he came back to me after 2 months and said he could not live that life or he would die. Then she found out he came back to me and she came over to my house while we were there. He would not let me answer the door. He never has been back in 5 months. He obviously told her again he would never see me again.
spend a lot of money on you =: yes, he was always buying me gifts, jewelry, etc.
what did he promise you =: He promised me a life, a future, we had a money market account, we started a LLC company together, we had house plans, he promised me he would marry me. He actually committed his life to me forever 3 years ago.
did you want to marry him or just have the affair =: I wanted to marry him. I waited till his youngest son went off to college and I told him it was time, and he could/would not do it.
are you still in contact with him = : No
did you have an abortion or a child =: no
did you date others =: I tried to see other men to get over him hurting me when he would disappear but I never could get involved because of my commitment to him
what advice would you give someone who is considering an affair? = : Don't do it, don't fall for anything they have to say. Tell them if they want you, you have to be number 1, they have to get a divorce.
what advice would you give a wife whose husband was having an affair =: Don't be an idiot. If you think he is not into you, then he probably is getting his needs met elsewhere. I would hire a service to follow him and tape his cell phone records, etc.
why do you tnink men have affairs =: I believe when you are married to the wrong person, someone you are not bound to in an intimate manner, the marriage is lacking. He and his wife (according to him) lacked intimacy. He said they were more like friends and room mates.
did you ever feel guilty about what you were doing -: Yes, I hated it. I encouraged him to make it right as soon as possible so we could stop being deceitful.
where how often regularly =: My house. He called me every single morning, ran to me, we spent most days together, lunch, afternoons at my house, traveled on vacations, he texted me goodnight each and every night.
did you tel did you tell friends or relatives =: Everyone in my life knew about this. They all believed he was a man who was going to do what he said.
what did you learn =: I learned that a person who seemed so sincere, so tender hearted, so true and committed to me,can just walk away like I was NOTHING. I have never been so hurt in my entire life.
Saturday, October 10, 2009
The Sympathetic "Other Woman" Survey
name for married lover: Romeo
make up a name for you: Juliet
how did your relationship get started =: I am a veterinary technician, he was the doc and owner of the practice. I was married for 12 years and my husband was abusive. Not that this is any excuse. I was going through an emotional struggle. I had tried to leave 2 other times and stayed bc he promised to change. He just continued to be the same. I was hurting and hated going home bc I knew it was tense. I loved my job. We had recently moved to this new town to get a new start, so I left my job of 10 yrs and started working for Romeo. Things just went back to the way they were and I knew no one out here in the country. I became really good friends withthe girls at work and really began to respect the doc. When I first interviewed w/ him I thought he was very strange. Months later we became close, joking with one another, talking over surgery and he taught me a lot of things about the business and in depth things about surgery and so on. Although I have been in the field for 10 years, I didn't work much with the surgeries. Needless to say, we all began going out on thurs nights for an hour or so. The doc bought us all a round of drinks and we would chat, play pool and just relax. It was nice to get away.
Romeo had a lot of respect for me, I brought a lot of ideas to his business from the large practice I worked at before, and helped out with client services and how to educate clients better to get them to use all of his services. We just made a good team, and became best friends over time and one night it happened. We both had made flirtation jokes, but I had a few drinks and spilled my guts a little that if he wasn't married...and then he kissed me. The next working day was weird bc we were not sure what the other was going to say. It just went on from there. It was exciting and I enjoyed being appreciated.
Over time, I fell deeply in love with him more and more as days went on. As far as his wife goes, the truth is I could never stand the way she acted towards him. There were times she would come in their with his best friend and they would come up front together (the friend)and were all over each other. She didn't talk to her husband very respectful either. I jsut felt like we shared this together, the lack of appreciation and disrespect from our spouses. I am a very sensitive person, and I am very compassionate. I am not a mean person, I swear! I have times where I feel so bad about this, and then other times I feel bad for him. I do understand why this happend. We were both emotionally unhappy in our marriages.
Needless to say, we were caught by my husband. I had already told him I wanted a divorce, he moved out. One day he left work early and came back to the house and we were "together". It was humiliating, embarassing, scary and regretful. It has been almost 2 years now, and we are still together. My divorce has been final for a while, but his is still going on. She is dragging it out and has pulled some nasty tricks on him. They both have businesses, so there is a lot to settl!
e. They went through counseling and were going to try to work it out, I lost my job of course. I have been supportive of whatever he needs to do. I do not like being the cause of the divorce. I just want him to be happy, even if that means with her. I do truly believe he loves me, and I do not think he wants to be with her. She uses scare tactics and guilt and belittling him to do the right thing and not divorce. I do understand I really have no right to get mad bc I did this to myself. I have broken it off with him and told him he needs to decide what he really wants and I should not be in the way if he loves her. He just comes back pleading his love for me and he wants to be with me, he just hates hurting her and needs to be easy with her. They do not live together and haven't for over a year. He still jumps through hoops to please her if she makes a request, even if it means me sitting at home alone. I suppose this is what I get. I didn't do this to be malicious. I truly love this man and would do anything for him. When we are together, it is just wonderful. It isn't forced, it is just natural for us. We enjoy each others company. We can not say anything and just sit and hold hands and it just feels right no matter what we are doing. I have to say, I am having my doubts now about the relationship. I am getting impatient and feeling guilty that the divorce is still not final. I am wondering if maybe his feelings are stronger than he realized and he just doesn't know which way to go.
e. They went through counseling and were going to try to work it out, I lost my job of course. I have been supportive of whatever he needs to do. I do not like being the cause of the divorce. I just want him to be happy, even if that means with her. I do truly believe he loves me, and I do not think he wants to be with her. She uses scare tactics and guilt and belittling him to do the right thing and not divorce. I do understand I really have no right to get mad bc I did this to myself. I have broken it off with him and told him he needs to decide what he really wants and I should not be in the way if he loves her. He just comes back pleading his love for me and he wants to be with me, he just hates hurting her and needs to be easy with her. They do not live together and haven't for over a year. He still jumps through hoops to please her if she makes a request, even if it means me sitting at home alone. I suppose this is what I get. I didn't do this to be malicious. I truly love this man and would do anything for him. When we are together, it is just wonderful. It isn't forced, it is just natural for us. We enjoy each others company. We can not say anything and just sit and hold hands and it just feels right no matter what we are doing. I have to say, I am having my doubts now about the relationship. I am getting impatient and feeling guilty that the divorce is still not final. I am wondering if maybe his feelings are stronger than he realized and he just doesn't know which way to go.
He is 25 yrs older than me and this bothers him. I get a lot of flack for it from others, so does he. Mainly our ex's. She tells him he is an old man and looks silly walking around with me. Anyway, I would do anything for him. Including walking away peacefully if he wants to work things out with his wife. It will hurt, but I would not want to be the choice he regrets. Honestly, I feel bad for the situation bc it has hurt so many people. Including myself. This has been one of the most painful experieces of my life. However, I do not regret my own divorce, it should have happened a long time ago. I just want peace in my life. I am so torm on whether to walk or hold on. He tells me he is going through with this divorce and he can't live without me. He has tried and everytime he tries to, he realizes how much he loves me. I sometimes feel foolish like it is never going to happen. As you can tell, I am very hurt and confused and do not know what to do. I do not want to lose his love, at the same time I do not want to be taken for granted.
would you do it again = : If this does not work out, I assure you I will never cross that line again. I would not even date a man who is going through divorce, ever!
never done this before =: No, he had stepped out of the marriage once before. He was upfront about this.
did he have any kids =: His kids are older and out of the house.It would not have mattered.
did you know his wife before or gret to know her?: I knew his wife from coming into the office, and she went out with us all one evening. She was very snobby from day 1, and thought of us employees as just nobody's. She was very short with all of us as if we were stupid.
did you ever contact his wife = : I would never contact her. It is not my place.
spend a lot of money on you =: I am just a simple girl. I am not into expensive things. He takes me to dinner and he has bought me things, but I really just enjoy his time!
what did he promise you =: Things would be ok.
did you want to marry him or just have the affair =: I would love to marry him. I do not think he is a bad guy, and I do not think he is a player. I think he is a respectable man that is tired of being worn down and degrated. Nothing he does is evern good enough for her. I do not hear this from him, I have seen it with her in the office and the majority of the town has said she has always done him this way. They say he shoud have left her a long time ago. He still defends her and says she can't help it, or it isn't as bad as what people say. He takes responsibility for his onw short comings too. This is one of the reasons I love him. He is a good man and tries to see the best in people. He is not judgemental and takes responsibility for his own doings. He is a good man.
are you still in contact with him = : yes
did you have an abortion or a child =: no
did you date others =: I have went on a few dates when he went back to his wife. I realized quickly, it was pointless and you can't date when you are in love with someone else. It isn't fair to the other person either.
what advice would you give someone who is considering an affair? = : Don't do it! If the marriage is really over, they will get out anyway. Then if you are available at the same time, you can date. Affairs are painful for all involved. Not just the obvious, but your children, your extended family and your friends. No one likes to see peole they love in pain. Everyone makes mistakes, and once you cross that line the feelings get deeper and it is messy. The guilt alone is heartbreaking and very depressing. Even if your partners significant other doesn't seem to love them, they still built that life together and you assisted in tearing it down.
what advice would you give a wife whose husband was having an affair =: I would feel like a hypocrite, but I would want to know how long. There is a difference in having a sexual affair and someone he is actually in love with. I would not want to be married to a man in love with someone else and one I could not trust. However, I would ask this same person if they have ever crossed the line, or even thought about it. I think you have to look deep into the marriage and ask why. Are you married just for the sake of not losing money, a house and there is no emotional bond? I think if deep down you are not really happy, you shouldn't stay. You are cheating them and yourself, and your kids. If all you do is fight, or even have no communication, what kind of example are you setting of a "loving healthy relationship".
why do you tnink men have affairs =: I think there are different situations. He was missing appreciation, sincerity, passion and communication.
did you ever feel guilty about what you were doing -: Yes
where how often regularly =: In the office, his house, my house, the park, lunches.
did you tel did you tell friends or relatives =: My closest friend, I worked with her. She figured it out. She said she did not condone it, but she understood. She said it was obvious there were fellings between us.
why do you tnink men have affairs =: I think there are different situations. He was missing appreciation, sincerity, passion and communication.
did you ever feel guilty about what you were doing -: Yes
where how often regularly =: In the office, his house, my house, the park, lunches.
did you tel did you tell friends or relatives =: My closest friend, I worked with her. She figured it out. She said she did not condone it, but she understood. She said it was obvious there were fellings between us.
what did you learn =: I have learned a lot. I can truly say I have learned a lot about love, myself and lines that should not be crossed. I can say before this man, I am not sure I have ever really been in love. The things I have been willing to sacrifice for him, the pain involved, the time I have put into this without knowing the outcome, it is like I am dieing inside between my love for him, my guilt for the situation, the things I have lost and the situation I have put myself in. I have 4 children who I love dearly and I do not like the example I have set and the situation they have experienced. He will always be my hero for making me see I did not deserve the abuse,and giving me the confidence to leave. My kids are happier children now that they do not have to live that life. However, I am not happy with the other things he has done. Stringing me along sometimes, my life is in limbo. Although I would never do this again, I do not regret our time together. I felt love for the first time. I know he loves me and has treated me better than any man ever has. The stringing along is just him being unable to decide what to do between his love for me and his responsibility to the promise he made so many years ago. I am not naive, I see the pain he is going through and he would be giving up a lot. If he were able to just up and leave for someone else without giving it any thought, I would be scared.
The Age of Aquarius
The Age of Aquarius
Comment on my article by a reader:
This is terrific and highly informative article. But I can not be naive to believe that the Fundamentalists will subscribe to ideas presented here. As Thomas Aquinas once said "for those who believe no proof is necessary; for those who don't believe no proof is possible." Yet it amazes me how much these "fundamentalists" don't know their own Bible at all and can only reference the Bible when trying to discredit the idea that the Bible is not a literal history.
Have you ever heard of the Zeitgeist Movement. It is headed up by a man named Peter Joseph who has made two very provocative movies on the fraudulence of religion, the monetary system and the world's governments. The movement itself is actually the activist arm of the Venus Project. The VP is a proposal of a money-free world where decisions are arrived at rather than voted on and manipulated through the priority of profit. The VP is gaining more and more popularity as this recession continues--especially in Europe. You can watch both films(Zeitgeist and Zeitgeist Addendum)online at googlevideo.com for free. This proposal makes no claim to be Utopian, but does address the true underlying causes of societal problems of today and offers true and unbiased solutions for those problems. I hope you will find these movies and discuss them with your students...because of the favor of Capitalism in the US, there seems to be very little awareness and support for it in this hemisphere.
Comment on my article by a reader:
This is terrific and highly informative article. But I can not be naive to believe that the Fundamentalists will subscribe to ideas presented here. As Thomas Aquinas once said "for those who believe no proof is necessary; for those who don't believe no proof is possible." Yet it amazes me how much these "fundamentalists" don't know their own Bible at all and can only reference the Bible when trying to discredit the idea that the Bible is not a literal history.
Have you ever heard of the Zeitgeist Movement. It is headed up by a man named Peter Joseph who has made two very provocative movies on the fraudulence of religion, the monetary system and the world's governments. The movement itself is actually the activist arm of the Venus Project. The VP is a proposal of a money-free world where decisions are arrived at rather than voted on and manipulated through the priority of profit. The VP is gaining more and more popularity as this recession continues--especially in Europe. You can watch both films(Zeitgeist and Zeitgeist Addendum)online at googlevideo.com for free. This proposal makes no claim to be Utopian, but does address the true underlying causes of societal problems of today and offers true and unbiased solutions for those problems. I hope you will find these movies and discuss them with your students...because of the favor of Capitalism in the US, there seems to be very little awareness and support for it in this hemisphere.
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Recommendations for Nancy R. Fenn
BeMyAstrologer.com
Terry Lamb, Owner, Inner Edge Human Technologies/Astro-Energetic Healingworked with Nancy at Bookstore
“Nancy is profoundly insightful. She has a superlative gift at grasping and presenting one's total life situation and issues with truly actionable ideas. And she is capable of drilling down to day to day specifics. I consider her a significant asset as I go forward on my personal journey.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Robert Dunbarhired Nancy as a Counseling in 1999, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is an excellent astrologer and psychic. She is the nation's Saturn Return expert and helped me through my second Saturn Return and with other situations in my life. She also taught me how to read Tarot cards and is an excellent teacher.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Semiramis Appiamohired Nancy as a Astrologer in 2000, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is a master at coaching, astrologer and reading. She has helped me in every area of my life. Further, I have referred COUNTLESS clients to Nancy for coaching. She is the nation's Expert on second Saturn Return (ages 58-60) and on Introverts. I recommend her without reservation.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Susan Dunnhired Nancy as a Career Coach in 1,985, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is one of the best psychic consultants I've encountered. I have had many readings with her and have referred quite a few friends. Her insight has proven itself time and again. When my son was born seven years ago she did his Natal Chart, which I refer to every so often. It has been a very helpful tool in understanding and interacting with his particular personality. I highly recommend Nancy. She is amazing.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Wendy Holmhired Nancy as a Psychic consultation in 1995, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is a wonderful caring advisor. She is highly intuitive, positive, intelligent, thorough and trustworthy. Nancy has gently guided me through many stressful times with her insightful advice and encouragement. She is always there for me, no matter what. I view her as not just an advisor or teacher but a friend. She is also a gifted teacher, who researches extensively, is open and receptive with a continuing sense of wonder.”
Top qualities: Personable, Expert, High Integrity
Mo Murrayhired Nancy as a Astrologer/Tarot Reader/Advisor in 2005, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is a wonderful astrologer and intuitive. She has given me insight into situations that I could have never seen on my own. She has a God given talent in these areas. She comes highly recommended and I have worked with her for over 15 years.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Personable, High Integrity
Tamara Grahamhired Nancy as a Astrologer in 1990, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy Fenn is an extremely gifted psychic and astrologer. She has guided me through many difficult times with her beacon of light, knowledge, and expertise. I am always in awe of her uncanny insight and psychological interpretations. Nancy possesses an eagle's eye of focus which has assisted me in targeting and obtaining my goals. Her tender gentleness and kindness melts away any fears I may have and is a calming center in my life. What I really admire about Nancy is her impeccable ability to predict and effect energy. I have elicited Nancy's help for years and will continue for years to come. She's utterly amazing and I don't know what I would do without her!”
Top qualities: Great Results, Personable, Expert
Margaret Lorishired Nancy as a International Teacher and Healer in 1996, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is a brilliant and expert astrologer specializing in saturn return chart readings. I came to her for a reading during that difficult time and her reading was so in-depth/thorough, intuitive, inspiring, and reassuring. Some of her insights simply amazed me. The entire process helped me immensely. Still today, I reread her report every few months to gain perspective on my life with a few new "aha...that's what that means" every time. It's kind of like a mini-life guide. I've been to many astrologers, and she is by far the best---she has strong intuitive faculties and is kind-hearted and approachable. I highly recommend her services!”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, Creative
Amy Provenzanohired Nancy as a Astrology in 2005, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy brings compassion and insight to every interaction i've had with her.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Personable, Creative
Michele Gutierrezhired Nancy as a Readings in 2004, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy offers remarkably intuitive insights to human personality and spirtuality. I came to Nancy because of her reputation as "Saturn's Return Expert." The chart she produced to help guide me through this period was remarkably on target, and I use it still as reference and guidance.”
Top qualities: Expert, High Integrity, Creative
Jon Layton, Astrologer, Skygroovesworked indirectly for Nancy at BeMyAstrologer
“I took Nancy's Tarot class and was so pleased with the results. Her insights into the symbolism and history of the cards was impressive. The lessons enriched my understanding of the human psyche, and her explanations illuminated the human condition.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Terry Lamb, Owner, Inner Edge Human Technologies/Astro-Energetic Healingworked with Nancy at Bookstore
“Nancy is profoundly insightful. She has a superlative gift at grasping and presenting one's total life situation and issues with truly actionable ideas. And she is capable of drilling down to day to day specifics. I consider her a significant asset as I go forward on my personal journey.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Robert Dunbarhired Nancy as a Counseling in 1999, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is an excellent astrologer and psychic. She is the nation's Saturn Return expert and helped me through my second Saturn Return and with other situations in my life. She also taught me how to read Tarot cards and is an excellent teacher.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Semiramis Appiamohired Nancy as a Astrologer in 2000, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is a master at coaching, astrologer and reading. She has helped me in every area of my life. Further, I have referred COUNTLESS clients to Nancy for coaching. She is the nation's Expert on second Saturn Return (ages 58-60) and on Introverts. I recommend her without reservation.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Susan Dunnhired Nancy as a Career Coach in 1,985, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is one of the best psychic consultants I've encountered. I have had many readings with her and have referred quite a few friends. Her insight has proven itself time and again. When my son was born seven years ago she did his Natal Chart, which I refer to every so often. It has been a very helpful tool in understanding and interacting with his particular personality. I highly recommend Nancy. She is amazing.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Wendy Holmhired Nancy as a Psychic consultation in 1995, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is a wonderful caring advisor. She is highly intuitive, positive, intelligent, thorough and trustworthy. Nancy has gently guided me through many stressful times with her insightful advice and encouragement. She is always there for me, no matter what. I view her as not just an advisor or teacher but a friend. She is also a gifted teacher, who researches extensively, is open and receptive with a continuing sense of wonder.”
Top qualities: Personable, Expert, High Integrity
Mo Murrayhired Nancy as a Astrologer/Tarot Reader/Advisor in 2005, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is a wonderful astrologer and intuitive. She has given me insight into situations that I could have never seen on my own. She has a God given talent in these areas. She comes highly recommended and I have worked with her for over 15 years.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Personable, High Integrity
Tamara Grahamhired Nancy as a Astrologer in 1990, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy Fenn is an extremely gifted psychic and astrologer. She has guided me through many difficult times with her beacon of light, knowledge, and expertise. I am always in awe of her uncanny insight and psychological interpretations. Nancy possesses an eagle's eye of focus which has assisted me in targeting and obtaining my goals. Her tender gentleness and kindness melts away any fears I may have and is a calming center in my life. What I really admire about Nancy is her impeccable ability to predict and effect energy. I have elicited Nancy's help for years and will continue for years to come. She's utterly amazing and I don't know what I would do without her!”
Top qualities: Great Results, Personable, Expert
Margaret Lorishired Nancy as a International Teacher and Healer in 1996, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy is a brilliant and expert astrologer specializing in saturn return chart readings. I came to her for a reading during that difficult time and her reading was so in-depth/thorough, intuitive, inspiring, and reassuring. Some of her insights simply amazed me. The entire process helped me immensely. Still today, I reread her report every few months to gain perspective on my life with a few new "aha...that's what that means" every time. It's kind of like a mini-life guide. I've been to many astrologers, and she is by far the best---she has strong intuitive faculties and is kind-hearted and approachable. I highly recommend her services!”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, Creative
Amy Provenzanohired Nancy as a Astrology in 2005, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy brings compassion and insight to every interaction i've had with her.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Personable, Creative
Michele Gutierrezhired Nancy as a Readings in 2004, and hired Nancy more than once
“Nancy offers remarkably intuitive insights to human personality and spirtuality. I came to Nancy because of her reputation as "Saturn's Return Expert." The chart she produced to help guide me through this period was remarkably on target, and I use it still as reference and guidance.”
Top qualities: Expert, High Integrity, Creative
Jon Layton, Astrologer, Skygroovesworked indirectly for Nancy at BeMyAstrologer
“I took Nancy's Tarot class and was so pleased with the results. Her insights into the symbolism and history of the cards was impressive. The lessons enriched my understanding of the human psyche, and her explanations illuminated the human condition.”
Top qualities: Great Results, Expert, High Integrity
Friday, September 25, 2009
BirthChart MacKEnzie Phillips
I think there's no doubt she's telling the truth - two major transits practically scream it - Saturn approaching the NNode and IC (DArk Night of the Soul) plus Pluto coming up on Saturn in the house of secret love affairs. In clearing this up, she is Virgo-ing her own Pisces (Nodes). That Stellium in the 4th - the old man definitely did her. Now she can heal.
Natally, Aries Moon in the 9th is a truth teller.
Thursday, September 24, 2009
Zodiac Sign Traits from an Astrological Aqua Man
He just visited "ZodiacTraits" to learn about compatiblity.
Dear Nancy,
I found you very spot on about sign compatibilities in astrology. Many things that you have said are really original and no others have dared to say specially about compatibility of virgo and aquarius and scorpio and aquarius. If you allow me, I will make my comment on each of your aquarius compatibility pages. (my astrological knowledge comes from years of experience with my patients).
AquaMan
Dear Nancy,
I found you very spot on about sign compatibilities in astrology. Many things that you have said are really original and no others have dared to say specially about compatibility of virgo and aquarius and scorpio and aquarius. If you allow me, I will make my comment on each of your aquarius compatibility pages. (my astrological knowledge comes from years of experience with my patients).
AquaMan
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
The Sympathetic "Other Woman" Survey
age =: 34
name for married lover: Romeo
make up a name for you: Juliet
how did your relationship get started =: I am a veterinary technician, he was the doc and owner of the practice. I was married for 12 years and my husband was abusive. Not that this is any excuse. I was going through an emotional struggle. I had tried to leave 2 other times and stayed bc he promised to change. He just continued to be the same. I was hurting and hated going home bc I knew it was tense. I loved my job. We had recently moved to this new town to get a new start, so I left my job of 10 yrs and started working for Romeo. Things just went back to the way they were and I knew no one out here in the country. I became really good friends withthe girls at work and really began to respect the doc. When I first interviewed w/ him I thought he was very strange. Months later we became close, joking with one another, talking over surgery and he taught me a lot of things about the business and in depth things about surgery and so on. Although I have been in the field for 10 years, I didn't work much with the surgeries. Needless to say, we all began going out on thurs nights for an hour or so. The doc bought us all a round of drinks and we would chat, play pool and just relax. It was nice to get away. Romeo had a lot of respect for me, I brought a lot of ideas to his business from the large practice I worked at before, and helped out with client services and how to educate clients better to get them to use all of his services. We just made a good team, and became best friends over time and one night it happened. We both had made flirtation jokes, but I had a few drinks and spilled my guts a little that if he wasn't married...and then he kissed me. The next working day was weird bc we were not sure what the other was going to say. It just went on from there. It was exciting and I enjoyed being appreciated. Over time, I fell deeply in love with him more and more as days went on. As far as his wife goes, the truth is I could never stand the way she acted towards him. There were times she would come in their with hi s best friend and they would come up front together (the friend)and were all over each other. She didn't talk to her husband very respectful either. I jsut felt like we shared this together, the lack of appreciation and disrespect from our spouses. I am a very sensitive person, and I am very compassionate. I am not a mean person, I swear! I have times where I feel so bad about this, and then other times I feel bad for him. I do understand why this happend. We were both emotionally unhappy in our marriages.Needless to say, we were caught by my husband. I had already told him I wanted a divorce, he moved out. One day he left work early and came back to the house and we were "together". It was humiliating, embarassing, scary and regretful. It has been almost 2 years now, and we are still together. My divorce has been final for a while, but his is still going on. She is dragging it out and has pulled some nasty tricks on him. They both have businesses, so there is a lot to settle. They went through counseling and were going to try to work it out, I lost my job of course. I have been supportive of whatever he needs to do. I do not like being the cause of the divorce. I just want him to be happy, even if that means with her. I do truly believe he loves me, and I do not think he wants to be with her. She uses scare tactics and guilt and belittling him to do the right thing and not divorce. I do understand I really have no right to get mad bc I did this to myself. I have broken it off with him and told him he needs to decide what he really wants and I should not be in the way if he loves her. He just comes back pleading his love for me and he wants to be with me, he just hates hurting her and needs to be easy with her. They do not live together and haven't for over a year. He still jumps through hoops to please her if she makes a request, even if it means me sitting at home alone. I suppose this is what I get. I didn't do this to be malicious. I truly love this man and would do anything for him. When we are together, it is just wonderful. It isn't forced, it is just natural for us. We enjoy each others company. We can not say anything and just sit and hold hands and it just feels right no matter what we are doing. I have to say, I am having my doubts now about the relationship. I am getting impatient and feeling guilty that the divorce is still not final. I am wondering if maybe his feelings are stronger than he realized and he just doesn't know which way to go. He is 25 yrs older than me and this bothers him. I get a lot of flack for it from others, so does he. Mainly our ex's. She tells him he is an old man and looks silly walking around with me. Anyway, I would do anything for him. Including walking away peacefully if he wants to work things out with his wife. It will hurt, but I would not want to be the choice he regrets. Honestly, I feel bad for the situation bc it has hurt so many people. Including myself. This has been one of the most painful experieces of my life. However, I do not regret my own divorce, it should have happened a long time ago. I just want peace in my life. I am so torm on whether to walk or hold on. He tells me he is going through with this divorce and he can't live without me. He has tried and everytime he tries to, he realizes how much he loves me. I sometimes feel foolish like it is never going to happen. As you can tell, I am very hurt and confused and do not know what to do. I do not want to lose his love, at the same time I do not want to be taken for granted.
would you do it again = : If this does not work out, I assure you I will never cross that line again. I would not even date a man who is going through divorce, ever!
never done this before =: No, he had stepped out of the marriage once before. He was upfront about this.
did he have any kids =: His kids are older and out of the house.It would not have mattered.
did you know his wife before or gret to know her?: I knew his wife from coming into the office, and she went out with us all one evening. She was very snobby from day 1, and thought of us employees as just nobody's. She was very short with all of us as if we were stupid.
did you ever contact his wife = : I would never contact her. It is not my place.
spend a lot of money on you =: I am just a simple girl. I am not into expensive things. He takes me to dinner and he has bought me things, but I really just enjoy his time!
what did he promise you =: Things would be ok.
did you want to marry him or just have the affair =: I would love to marry him. I do not think he is a bad guy, and I do not think he is a player. I think he is a respectable man that is tired of being worn down and degrated. Nothing he does is evern good enough for her. I do not hear this from him, I have seen it with her in the office and the majority of the town has said she has always done him this way. They say he shoud have left her a long time ago. He still defends her and says she can't help it, or it isn't as bad as what people say. He takes responsibility for his onw short comings too. This is one of the reasons I love him. He is a good man and tries to see the best in people. He is not judgemental and takes responsibility for his own doings. He is a good man.
are you still in contact with him = : yes
did you have an abortion or a child =: no
did you date others =: I have went on a few dates when he went back to his wife. I realized quickly, it was pointless and you can't date when you are in love with someone else. It isn't fair to the other person either.
what advice would you give someone who is considering an affair? = : Don't do it! If the marriage is really over, they will get out anyway. Then if you are available at the same time, you can date. Affairs are painful for all involved. Not just the obvious, but your children, your extended family and your friends. No one likes to see peole they love in pain. Everyone makes mistakes, and once you cross that line the feelings get deeper and it is messy. The guilt alone is heartbreaking and very depressing. Even if your partners significant other doesn't seem to love them, they still built that life together and you assisted in tearing it down.
what advice would you give a wife whose husband was having an affair =: I would feel like a hypocrite, but I would want to know how long. There is a difference in having a sexual affair and someone he is actually in love with. I would not want to be married to a man in love with someone else and one I could not trust. However, I would ask this same person if they have ever crossed the line, or even thought about it. I think you have to look deep into the marriage and ask why. Are you married just for the sake of not losing money, a house and there is no emotional bond? I think if deep down you are not really happy, you shouldn't stay. You are cheating them and yourself, and your kids. If all you do is fight, or even have no communication, what kind of example are you setting of a "loving healthy relationship".
why do you tnink men have affairs =: I think there are different situations. He was missing appreciation, sincerity, passion and communication.
did you ever feel guilty about what you were doing -: Yes
where how often regularly =: In the office, his house, my house, the park, lunches.
did you tel did you tell friends or relatives =: My closest friend, I worked with her. She figured it out. She said she did not condone it, but she understood. She said it was obvious there were fellings between us.
what did you learn =: I have learned a lot. I can truly say I have learned a lot about love, myself and lines that should not be crossed. I can say before this man, I am not sure I have ever really been in love. The things I have been willing to sacrifice for him, the pain involved, the time I have put into this without knowing the outcome, it is like I am dieing inside between my love for him, my guilt for the situation, the things I have lost and the situation I have put myself in. I have 4 children who I love dearly and I do not like the example I have set and the situation they have experienced. He will always be my hero for making me see I did not deserve the abuse,and giving me the confidence to leave. My kids are happier children now that they do not have to live that life. However, I am not happy with the other things he has done. Stringing me along sometimes, my life is in limbo. Although I would never do this again, I do not regret our time together. I felt love for the first time. I know he loves me and has treated me better than any man ever has. The stringing along is just him being unable to decide what to do between his love for me and his responsibility to the promise he made so many years ago. I am not naive, I see the pain he is going through and he would be giving up a lot. If he were able to just up and leave for someone else without giving it any thought, I would be scared.
name for married lover: Romeo
make up a name for you: Juliet
how did your relationship get started =: I am a veterinary technician, he was the doc and owner of the practice. I was married for 12 years and my husband was abusive. Not that this is any excuse. I was going through an emotional struggle. I had tried to leave 2 other times and stayed bc he promised to change. He just continued to be the same. I was hurting and hated going home bc I knew it was tense. I loved my job. We had recently moved to this new town to get a new start, so I left my job of 10 yrs and started working for Romeo. Things just went back to the way they were and I knew no one out here in the country. I became really good friends withthe girls at work and really began to respect the doc. When I first interviewed w/ him I thought he was very strange. Months later we became close, joking with one another, talking over surgery and he taught me a lot of things about the business and in depth things about surgery and so on. Although I have been in the field for 10 years, I didn't work much with the surgeries. Needless to say, we all began going out on thurs nights for an hour or so. The doc bought us all a round of drinks and we would chat, play pool and just relax. It was nice to get away. Romeo had a lot of respect for me, I brought a lot of ideas to his business from the large practice I worked at before, and helped out with client services and how to educate clients better to get them to use all of his services. We just made a good team, and became best friends over time and one night it happened. We both had made flirtation jokes, but I had a few drinks and spilled my guts a little that if he wasn't married...and then he kissed me. The next working day was weird bc we were not sure what the other was going to say. It just went on from there. It was exciting and I enjoyed being appreciated. Over time, I fell deeply in love with him more and more as days went on. As far as his wife goes, the truth is I could never stand the way she acted towards him. There were times she would come in their with hi s best friend and they would come up front together (the friend)and were all over each other. She didn't talk to her husband very respectful either. I jsut felt like we shared this together, the lack of appreciation and disrespect from our spouses. I am a very sensitive person, and I am very compassionate. I am not a mean person, I swear! I have times where I feel so bad about this, and then other times I feel bad for him. I do understand why this happend. We were both emotionally unhappy in our marriages.Needless to say, we were caught by my husband. I had already told him I wanted a divorce, he moved out. One day he left work early and came back to the house and we were "together". It was humiliating, embarassing, scary and regretful. It has been almost 2 years now, and we are still together. My divorce has been final for a while, but his is still going on. She is dragging it out and has pulled some nasty tricks on him. They both have businesses, so there is a lot to settle. They went through counseling and were going to try to work it out, I lost my job of course. I have been supportive of whatever he needs to do. I do not like being the cause of the divorce. I just want him to be happy, even if that means with her. I do truly believe he loves me, and I do not think he wants to be with her. She uses scare tactics and guilt and belittling him to do the right thing and not divorce. I do understand I really have no right to get mad bc I did this to myself. I have broken it off with him and told him he needs to decide what he really wants and I should not be in the way if he loves her. He just comes back pleading his love for me and he wants to be with me, he just hates hurting her and needs to be easy with her. They do not live together and haven't for over a year. He still jumps through hoops to please her if she makes a request, even if it means me sitting at home alone. I suppose this is what I get. I didn't do this to be malicious. I truly love this man and would do anything for him. When we are together, it is just wonderful. It isn't forced, it is just natural for us. We enjoy each others company. We can not say anything and just sit and hold hands and it just feels right no matter what we are doing. I have to say, I am having my doubts now about the relationship. I am getting impatient and feeling guilty that the divorce is still not final. I am wondering if maybe his feelings are stronger than he realized and he just doesn't know which way to go. He is 25 yrs older than me and this bothers him. I get a lot of flack for it from others, so does he. Mainly our ex's. She tells him he is an old man and looks silly walking around with me. Anyway, I would do anything for him. Including walking away peacefully if he wants to work things out with his wife. It will hurt, but I would not want to be the choice he regrets. Honestly, I feel bad for the situation bc it has hurt so many people. Including myself. This has been one of the most painful experieces of my life. However, I do not regret my own divorce, it should have happened a long time ago. I just want peace in my life. I am so torm on whether to walk or hold on. He tells me he is going through with this divorce and he can't live without me. He has tried and everytime he tries to, he realizes how much he loves me. I sometimes feel foolish like it is never going to happen. As you can tell, I am very hurt and confused and do not know what to do. I do not want to lose his love, at the same time I do not want to be taken for granted.
would you do it again = : If this does not work out, I assure you I will never cross that line again. I would not even date a man who is going through divorce, ever!
never done this before =: No, he had stepped out of the marriage once before. He was upfront about this.
did he have any kids =: His kids are older and out of the house.It would not have mattered.
did you know his wife before or gret to know her?: I knew his wife from coming into the office, and she went out with us all one evening. She was very snobby from day 1, and thought of us employees as just nobody's. She was very short with all of us as if we were stupid.
did you ever contact his wife = : I would never contact her. It is not my place.
spend a lot of money on you =: I am just a simple girl. I am not into expensive things. He takes me to dinner and he has bought me things, but I really just enjoy his time!
what did he promise you =: Things would be ok.
did you want to marry him or just have the affair =: I would love to marry him. I do not think he is a bad guy, and I do not think he is a player. I think he is a respectable man that is tired of being worn down and degrated. Nothing he does is evern good enough for her. I do not hear this from him, I have seen it with her in the office and the majority of the town has said she has always done him this way. They say he shoud have left her a long time ago. He still defends her and says she can't help it, or it isn't as bad as what people say. He takes responsibility for his onw short comings too. This is one of the reasons I love him. He is a good man and tries to see the best in people. He is not judgemental and takes responsibility for his own doings. He is a good man.
are you still in contact with him = : yes
did you have an abortion or a child =: no
did you date others =: I have went on a few dates when he went back to his wife. I realized quickly, it was pointless and you can't date when you are in love with someone else. It isn't fair to the other person either.
what advice would you give someone who is considering an affair? = : Don't do it! If the marriage is really over, they will get out anyway. Then if you are available at the same time, you can date. Affairs are painful for all involved. Not just the obvious, but your children, your extended family and your friends. No one likes to see peole they love in pain. Everyone makes mistakes, and once you cross that line the feelings get deeper and it is messy. The guilt alone is heartbreaking and very depressing. Even if your partners significant other doesn't seem to love them, they still built that life together and you assisted in tearing it down.
what advice would you give a wife whose husband was having an affair =: I would feel like a hypocrite, but I would want to know how long. There is a difference in having a sexual affair and someone he is actually in love with. I would not want to be married to a man in love with someone else and one I could not trust. However, I would ask this same person if they have ever crossed the line, or even thought about it. I think you have to look deep into the marriage and ask why. Are you married just for the sake of not losing money, a house and there is no emotional bond? I think if deep down you are not really happy, you shouldn't stay. You are cheating them and yourself, and your kids. If all you do is fight, or even have no communication, what kind of example are you setting of a "loving healthy relationship".
why do you tnink men have affairs =: I think there are different situations. He was missing appreciation, sincerity, passion and communication.
did you ever feel guilty about what you were doing -: Yes
where how often regularly =: In the office, his house, my house, the park, lunches.
did you tel did you tell friends or relatives =: My closest friend, I worked with her. She figured it out. She said she did not condone it, but she understood. She said it was obvious there were fellings between us.
what did you learn =: I have learned a lot. I can truly say I have learned a lot about love, myself and lines that should not be crossed. I can say before this man, I am not sure I have ever really been in love. The things I have been willing to sacrifice for him, the pain involved, the time I have put into this without knowing the outcome, it is like I am dieing inside between my love for him, my guilt for the situation, the things I have lost and the situation I have put myself in. I have 4 children who I love dearly and I do not like the example I have set and the situation they have experienced. He will always be my hero for making me see I did not deserve the abuse,and giving me the confidence to leave. My kids are happier children now that they do not have to live that life. However, I am not happy with the other things he has done. Stringing me along sometimes, my life is in limbo. Although I would never do this again, I do not regret our time together. I felt love for the first time. I know he loves me and has treated me better than any man ever has. The stringing along is just him being unable to decide what to do between his love for me and his responsibility to the promise he made so many years ago. I am not naive, I see the pain he is going through and he would be giving up a lot. If he were able to just up and leave for someone else without giving it any thought, I would be scared.
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