10 Good Tips from Mister Rogers

27 Apr 09 The Top Ten Things I Learned from Mister Rogers

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Mister Rogers makes everyone feel special and valued, and he's one of my heroes.
1. You can never go down, never go down, never go down the drain. When life can involve divorce, layoffs, losing a child, moving 2 weeks before your baby's due and you have a toddler and a dog with a new litter of puppies, working full-time and being a single-parent, or starting a new career at 55, it's good to know you can never go down the drain!

2. You can stop when you want to, stop when you wishEver say to yourself -- stop the madness? Mister Rogers reminds us that we can stop when we want to. Make the carousel slow down so you can enjoy the ride. You're in control. Stop the roller coaster and get off. End a relationship that isn't working. Change a career when the passion's gone. Eliminate the tolerations in your life! You can stop when you want to, stop when you wish.

3. It's great to be able to stop when you've planned a thing that's wrong and to be able to do something else instead. Problem-solving! When you're working at a problem and the answer isn't forthcoming, try something new. The solution isn't doubling your efforts at a failing proposition. If you're having the same things happen over and over again in your relationships, stop what you're doing and do something else. Try something new! If you keep doing' what you've been doin', you're gonna keep gettin' what you been gettin'.

4. There's something deep inside that helps us become what we can. Develop your intuition and pay attention to what it tells you. It's the best guide to what's best for you and what will work for you. Listen to that still, small voice inside and let it be your guide ... it's an EQ competency.

5. When the whole wide world seems oh so wrong and nothing you do seems very right, you can punch a bag, pound some clay or some dough, or round up friends for a game of tag or see how fast you can go. Change what you can, and those things you can't ... go chop some wood, or take a bike ride, or call your coach and talk the feelings out. You might as well learn to manage those feelings constructively now, because the stakes are just going to get higher in life, so the feelings will too. It's a lifelong mission changing what you can, and finding some play-doh when you can't!

6. What a good feeling to feel like this and know that the feeling is really mine. Knowing what you feel and living in the moment will add much enjoyment to your life. We ARE our feelings, and the more we're able to let them into awareness and accept them fully, the richer our lives will be, and the more US we'll be. If you can't experience your sadness, you can't experience your joy. And don't let someone else's feelings get mixed up with yours. Just because your spouse is having a down day doesn't mean you have to. Just because your co-worker hates his job doesn't mean you have to. Know your feelings and know that they're really yours.

7. A girl can some day be a woman, and a boy can some day be a man. Yup!

8. You know, playing at the computer's different from watching a television program. You can bring your own ideas to whatever happens on the computer, and your ideas are special. So are you! I think the computer is the most wonderful medium for self-expression we've had since crayons and manila paper! I'm watching clients, friends and loved ones blossom and grow through the Internet -- learning new things, making new cyber-friends, trying new things, and extending and enriching their lives. It's a great way to share you, who are special, and your ideas too.

9. Some are fancy on the outside/Some are fancy on the inside/Everybody's fancy/Everybody's fine/Discovering each one's specialty/Is the most important learning. Discover and develop the ways in which you're special. You'll reach a higher, more consistent level of performance, feel a deeper sense of satisfaction, and be able to share your real gifts with the world. (See the Top Ten Reasons Why You Should Focus on Your Strengths at http://www.topten.org/public/AB/AB100.html.)

10. If you've got a plan/Now's the time to try it/If you've got an airplane/Fly it/This is just the day. When will you start that new career? Ask that woman to marry you? Hug your child? Get online? Have the baby you've been wanting? Find work that feeds your passion? Quit drinking? Stop smoking? Write a teacher who meant a lot to you in the past? This is just the day!

About the author: Susan Dunn is a personal and professional growth coach, specializing in emotional intelligence. You can visit her on the web at http://www.susandunn.cc.

Author: Susan Dunn, M.A